Today’s random top 5 is dedicated to those pop culture characters who fell short of triumph. In their never ending quest to destroy ideas, writers have insisted on the inclusion of robots into plot outlines for decades. The following robots represent the worst of the worst in terms of robot inclusion in the motion picture and television industry.
5. Sico (aka Paulie’s Robot from Rocky 4).
Why exactly the Rockey script called for a robot is beyond me . With the amazing ability to add absolutely nothing to a plot and make a Stalone movie worse, ‘Sico’ gets bonus points for making an already terrible idea for a movie and ruining it more. Bonus points for being an especially worthless robot, I never though a Rocky character could get any lazier than Paulie. Although I am sure ‘Sico’ stands for something, my own theory is that it actually was supposed to stand for Sicko (see below).
I would be scared out of my mind if this robot tried to molest me too kid.
Robots giving humans beer is the first sign of Robot apocalypse if you ask me.
4. MechaGodzilla -
What is the best way to take on a ancient gigantic fire breathing monster? Simple, just build an exact replica of Godzilla and fill it with explosives, thus became MechaGodzilla. Obviously plot runs very thin in the Godzilla franchise but MechaGodzilla manages to fail on the simplest of levels for simply being even more ridiculous than his flesh and bone counterpart.
What is that Godzilla in drag? Nope just good old MechaGodzilla … weak
Is it cool if I root against humanity on this one?
3. RoboCop-
Although technically not a robot but more of a cyborg, RoboCop comes in at a honorable number three. Robocop was mainly included for combining two things I despise, Robots and Cops. As if the plot to the RoboCop franchise was not bad enough the story takes place in Detroit, which unless you Michel Moore does not equal the makings of a hit film.
Can I please see your fishing license sir?
2. “Vicki” -(AKA that scary as shit little girl from 1980′s sitcom Small Wonder)
I can’t help but be skeptical that below the jolly old 80′s family sitcom a terminator is waiting to destroy me (don’t believe me look at the dead eyes in the pictures below). Although if there were a terminator underneath the harmless exterior of “Vicki” I might actually have taken her off this list on the grounds that she would be awesome, at the very least better than Terminator Salvation.
Random true story: When I was in pre-school, there were two twin sisters who looked exactly like “viki”, and for that reason they will forever scared the crap out of me.
Call me crazy but there is something just wrong about raising a Robot like your own child.
Plot outline will self destruct in t-minus 10 … 9 … 8
1. C3PO- Star Wars (every movie)
When life gives you a useless random robot, paint it gold and name him C3PO
Despite being a main character in the Star Wars franchise C3P0 takes top honors on this random list of terrible robots. To put it bluntly C3PO offers absolutely nothing to the Star Wars plot or Characters. Sure C3PO’s duties include serving as a protocol droid designed to serve humans, and sure he is fluent “in over six million forms of communication.” But realistically you only need like 3 forms of communication in the Star Wars galaxy, considering basically everyone speaks or understands English. Although C3PO is a terrible stain on the reputation of all Movie and TV robots, it took the master George Lucas to really kill the Star Wars franchise.